Sunday, October 21, 2007

Purity Balls

From the Now That's Just Creepy file:

In a chandelier-lit ballroom overlooking the Rocky Mountains one recent evening, some hundred couples feast on herb-roasted chicken and julienned vegetables. The men look dapper in tuxedos; their dates are resplendent in floor-length gowns, long white gloves and tiaras framing twirly, ornate updos. Seated at a table with four couples, I watch as the gray-haired man next to me reaches into his breast pocket, pulls out a small satin box and flips it open to check out a gold ring he's about to place on the finger of the woman sitting to his right. Her eyes well up with tears as she is overcome by emotion.

The man's date? His 25-year old daughter. Welcome to Colorado Springs' Seventh Annual Father-Daughter Purity Ball, held at the five-star Broadmoor Hotel. The event's purpose is, in part, to celebrate dad-daughter bonding, but the main agenda is for fathers to vow to protect the girls' chastity until they marry and for the daughters to promise to stay pure.

That's how Glamour magazine describes the lastest thing in the fad-prone fundagelical world. Never mind that, as the article points out, 88% of fundagelical abstinence pledgers end up having sex before marriage anyway, are more likely than non-pledgers to have oral and anal sex and are less likely to use condoms when they do.

Purity balls? They remind me of what Peggy Bundy's Wanker County cousin Effie said in Episode 606 of "Married with Children."

There's nothin' but sin in the city anyways. I say if you're gonna gyrate naked on tables for money, you should do it for the family.


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